you are waiting for your boyfriend?" without recognizing me! Seeing that I could pass as a girl boosted my courage, so I began to walk. I had gone several blocks when a yound man tried to escort me. At first I thought that he was the man I was looking for. But when he tried to embrace me I dashed for home. It really frightened me! Safe at home I realized that I was thoroughly frightened, but at the same time I was pleased with my successful job of passing. I had known for some time that I like to dress, but now I began to like to go out dressed. However, I carefully avoided any further confrontations with men.
My desire to dress varied in intensity. I sometimes sneaked into the rooms of my sleeping sisters to seek their clothes. And when I was unable to dress I thought I would go crazy.
One day when I was 14 or so, two buddies at work wanted to go see the gay queens. I thought this would do me good and would help me break my habit and make a man of me. But it worked just the opposite: I only wanted more strongly to dress. Even worse, I wanted to look just like that queen I had seen, dressed as she was and with face made up as hers was!
At home the situation was more difficult each day. It got to the point where I was buying clothes, wearing them once, then burning them since I had no place to keep them. I finally decided to leave my home town and come to the city in which I now reside.
Before I came here, though, I had seen an article in "Sexology" that helped me very much, entitled "My Experience as a TV.” Also, I read that a doctor advised men like me to consult a psychiatrist. This I did, and he attempted to find the cause of my compulsion through some event in my infancy. I did become calmer after several visits, and he did tell me that I was not a homosexual and that I should convince myself of this fact. Little by little I was recovering my health and my tranquility. I might
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